Light Bulb

8:53 AM Argile: help! It’s like viral poison! http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HomePage

8:56 AM Sven: you don’t approve of this project?

8:58 AM Argile: it’s sucking my time away like some sort of fiendish chronovacuum

 Sven: why?

  you feel compelled to post to it?

8:59 AM Argile: start reading the tropes

  they link like crazy and it’s just…. too hard to stop

9:03 AM Sven: yeah they are fun

9:07 AM Argile: i couldn’t stop

  it took an email to get me away

9:08 AM Sven: i’ve got subcontractors (againt) and my boss milling around, so i can only look at them for a minute or 2 at a time

9:09 AM Argile: but that’s just about perfect, bite-sized snacks of entertainment

 Sven: yeah, it’s cool

9:10 AM and i feel sneaky and ninja-like when stealing a read

  or saying something to you

9:38 AM Argile: wow, know what I love? improvisational speeches to boards of directors, that’s what

 Sven: did you just have to do that?

9:39 AM Argile: yes, yes I did

  president of my company walks in, says he’s on the board of a place we’re doing a site for, and can I come in and descibe what we’re doing, etc.

9:40 AM because the board’s meeting right then and there

  yay me!

9:41 AM Sven: nicely done

9:42 AM Argile: yeah, well, it’s still BS even if I do it well

9:44 AM and who’s the high points scorer for the week? Me.

  because I’m awesome.

9:45 AM Ronnie and I were talking and he said it was crap that he played the only person who beat him

9:46 AM Sven: yeah yeah, that was the story of my life for the first half of last season

9:47 AM and again, the football gods took pity on you for the ignominious end of the bears game

9:48 AM Argile: yeah, probably true. That was pretty bullshit that our super-QB sucked it up

  and our top defensive player is out for the season

 Sven: yeah that’s gotta hurt

9:52 AM Argile: oh well. just got news that the site my pres wants to show his board won’t be up because other people haven’t showed up at the office yet

 Sven: d’oh?

 Argile: which means, likely, that I’m going to get in trouble for something that’s no fault of mine

 Sven: that blows

  welcome to corporate life

9:55 AM and now the office is empty

  my boss will be running around the rest of the day, and the coworker is going to a bid-letting

9:57 AM Argile: joy of joys, eh?

  meeting at 10…

9:59 AM Sven: have fun

10:54 AM Argile: no I refuse to have fun. On principle. Fun and jobs don’t mix.

 Sven: that might not be the right attitude

10:55 AM you can dislike your current job, but do you plan on disliking all other jobs?

 Argile: yep. ebenezar scrooge is my hero.

 Sven: that’s admirable

10:58 AM interesting, there’s actually some cool-looking movies coming out in january

11:03 AM Argile: cool looking, yet likely crappy in execution

 Sven: possibly

11:04 AM book of eli-probably not as good as the trailer suggests

  daybreakers looks kinda sweet, though

  both have good casts, though

11:05 AM although, i guess book of eli having both gary oldman and mila kunis results in a wash between the two

11:06 AM Argile: kunis is cute though

 Sven: that she is

11:07 AM not entirely sure she belongs in the “post-apocalyptic thriller” genre, but oh well

  meanwhile, gary oldman and denzel washington kick a lot of ass

11:08 AM Argile: that’s true

  david lynch is on esquire’s 75 most wonderful persons list

 Sven: interesting

  not the sort of list i’d expect esquire to have, but that’s ok

11:13 AM Argile: it’s a list of people they’d want to have a drink with, and trust with a puppy

11:14 AM check it out.

 Sven: david lynch makes a list like that?

  the drink part i can see

11:21 AM Argile: http://www.esquire.com/features/best-people-1009?click=pp

11:24 AM Sven: aha

11:25 AM you said “most wonderful”

  no wonder my google search was fruitless

 Argile: you had to search google, even though you knew it was on esquire?

11:26 AM Sven: figured i’d skip a step

  the last thing you told me about on the esquire website i was unable to find

  and it would have been harder this time ‘cuz you gave me an erroneous list name

11:29 AM Argile: you, sir, need to expand your mind

 Sven: you’re not telling me to start doing drugs, are you?

11:35 AM Argile: couldn’t make things any worse

11:36 AM Sven: i’m not sure about that…

  drugs are expensive, doncha know

11:37 AM Argile: just get a paint can

11:38 AM Sven: erm, right

  i think this list of esquire’s is facetious

11:39 AM Argile: ?

 Sven: no way would i trust rupert murdoch with a puppy

11:42 AM Argile: you kidding? he’d probably make it another Fox news commentator

  it’d be smarter than the rest of them

11:43 AM Sven: i dunno, i think it’d be shitcanned like the rest if it didn’t build a shrine to Ronald Reagan in its doghouse

11:59 AM I’m going to eat lunch now though

 Sven: enjoy

Argile: blarg. anything interesting happen lately?

 Sven: ummm…nope

1:27 PM i turned down that trade offer from yesterday

  that’s about it

 Argile: thrilling

  yeah, I’ve had to make a couple of tough changes

1:28 PM though, of course, my stellar week 1 score should set the trend for my undeafeated fantasy season

 Sven: uh huh

1:29 PM i recall you were the juggernaut last year, too

  coasted to division champ with a nigh-unbeaten record

  how did that work out for you?

 Argile: sigh. one game.

  so much bs.

1:30 PM Sven: yeah, that’s how it goes in football, fantasy or otherwise

1:34 PM Argile: it’s alright, I judge a season by the record I have at the end anyway, and by that measure I’ve done pretty well

1:35 PM Sven: shy of winning a superbowl, that’s the next best metric

1:40 PM Argile: purty much

1:41 PM Sven: so my cousin pledged SAE, which resulted in me getting an fb invite to an SAE party on saturday

1:45 PM kinda relieved to be out of town this weekend

1:49 PM Argile: woot! SAE!

 Sven: uh, yeah

1:50 PM part of me thinks it’d be fun, in the weird hollywood sense, to relive college with frat antics as a staple

  but only in the “ripped straight from a bad teen movie” sense

1:52 PM Argile: and who among us hasn’t wanted to live through a bad teen movie?

1:53 PM Sven: no one i know

1:57 PM Argile: exactly.

1:58 PM Sven: people in those movies seem to be pretty much tripping over top-shelf, morally flexible tail

1:59 PM Argile: and soon you will be, too

2:00 PM Sven: right…if only

  knowing my luck, i probably would literally trip over one of them and break my glasses

2:03 PM busy day for you, i take it?

 Argile: no, not really

  just reading news

2:04 PM Sven: but of course

2:05 PM Argile: I’m so bored, and I don’t have the programs that would let me learn cool things

2:06 PM Sven: one wonders from wher e you draw the strength to carry on

2:10 PM Argile: hell if I know

  life’s rough, man, let me tell you

2:11 PM Sven: no doubt

2:21 PM Argile: I also did some salary research, that job in Boston would actually pay = or less than what I’m making here

  there’s more in terms of career growth out there, but at first it’d be tight

2:22 PM Sven: aha

  so what’d you decide?

2:23 PM Argile: I’ll stay here for the moment

  I have a better shot getting a good job with that place in minneapolis or Mayo

2:24 PM Sven: and you won’t have to leave the wonderful midwest

2:26 PM Argile: oh yeah, because that was high up on my list

2:27 PM Sven: yeah, we all know you’re too cool for the midwest

2:29 PM Argile: bet your ass I am

2:30 PM Sven: you’re gonna wind up living in Missour-ah

  calling it now

2:34 PM Argile: if I have to, hello st louis

 Sven: no, i think they call it Missouri

2:35 PM you’ll be in the missour-ah part of the state

2:37 PM Argile: then I’d better be rich with a gigantic mansion in beautiful country

  or teaching at Columbia

2:38 PM Sven: good, you keep up that optimism

2:40 PM Argile: well, if I’m in central missouri in neither of those situations, odds are I’ll have a bottle of moonshine in one hand, a dumb blonde wife in the other, and a bunch of kids to kick around

  not a completely horrible life

 Sven: way to stay positive

  props on the child-beating

2:42 PM Argile: hey, as a father it’s my job to make sure my children are never as good as me

2:43 PM Sven: but you have to ensure that they keep trying to live up to your impossible standards

2:44 PM Argile: yeah, good point, and then I’ll whisper that I love them as they lay dying outside of the burning wreckage that is their car on prom night

 Sven: that should make up for everything

2:47 PM should your daughter make it out alive, she’ll simply wind up an enormous slut

  which will in turn make the world a better place for the various men that come into her sphere of contact

2:48 PM and then, through the magic of STD’s, thin out the gene pool and reduce human population by that same number of guys

2:51 PM Argile: so you’re saying I’m some sort of cleaning agent for humanity thanks to my inevitably damaged offspring?

 Sven: that’s the most positive spin i can put on it, yes

  provided those same guys die prior to spreading the disease

2:52 PM or diseases, as the case will likely be

 Argile: ok

3:23 PM Sven: anything to look forward to after work?

 Argile: nope

  more computer stuff actually

3:30 PM Argile: who needs guns!? http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/maryland/baltimore-city/bal-sword0915,0,4027961.story

3:32 PM Sven: that’s pretty hardcore

  if/when he gets out of jail, that guy’ll be drowning in semi-nerdy, anime-crazed tail

3:33 PM Argile: yeah, not sure how you’d go about living with that though

  sure, the guy was a scumbag, but to “nearly sever” his hand??

  talk about traumatic

3:34 PM Sven: that would be horrible

  but then he killed him, so at least he didn’t have to live crippled

3:36 PM Argile: good point, because who wants to live crippled when you could be dead?

Sven: exactly

3:37 PM yeah, it’d be some heavy to shit to know you killed a man with a sword

3:38 PM but then, you went to the henhouse to investigate a noise with a freakin’ sword

  what did you think you’d do with it?

3:39 PM Argile: shave?

3:40 PM Sven: fair enough

  after the fact, i guess you can look at it as either, “i just killed a man, and i feel terrible”…

  or

3:41 PM “i killed a bastard with a sword in self defense!”

  optional “i’m hardcore!” followup statement

3:44 PM Argile: no, see, he should have cut a small scar into his own arm

  1

  that way, he could just add more notches as he kills more

 Sven: that would also be pretty hardcore

3:45 PM Argile: and then he could’ve licked the blade clean

 Sven: well, yeah

3:46 PM i was thinking in terms of hindsight

  your suggestions would have made it more badass at the time

  i’m simply saying afterwords, he can either succumb to his loss of humanity or embrace the badassness of his actions

3:48 PM Argile: true, true

  or, he could get a translucent cell-phone http://www.engadget.com/tag/pureness

 Sven: very smooth segue

3:49 PM Argile: smooth like the broken remnants of nuked new york

 Sven: quoi?

3:50 PM Argile: eh, nothin, just accentuating your comparison

3:51 PM Sven: with a largely indecipherable simile?

3:55 PM Argile: pretty much

3:56 PM Sven: very good then

 Argile: but at least it wasn’t this: http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0915091hotdate1.html

3:58 PM Sven: some of those hooker’s look don’t look too bad

  some are pretty fugly, though

3:59 PM whoa

  and one ‘em definitely took a money shot to the eye

4:00 PM Argile: read the intro “Two of them were pregnant”

 Sven: yeah, i saw that

  but you know, i’m sure some guys are into that

4:01 PM Argile: yeah, the worlds a little f-ed up sometimes

 Sven: mos def

4:05 PM but it is the world’s oldest industry

  ain’t goin’ away any time soon

4:18 PM Sven: well, i’m outta here

  gotta go do homework now…booo